Irreverent Funnies

Here are some more funnies from my Pinterest page I thought you might enjoy! :D

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: 9gag.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: allofmywords.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: imgur.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: tickld.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: failblog.files.wordpress.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: artnet.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: 9gag.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

...I shall leave you with this little bit of irreverence. Jesus would SO laugh at this. ;)

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Pinterest Funnies

Here are some things I've found on Pinterest (and beyond) that made me laugh. Hope these make you happy! :) You should come join me over there, it's fun! And if nothing else, you can go look at what I've pinned here!

Source: fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: static.someecards.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: littlewhitelion.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: imgfave.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: youtube.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: themetapicture.com via Jessie on Pinterest

"Yell Ding Dong Really Loud!"

When I zone out, and I do quite often, my fingers move across the computer keys and magically land me in the crazy abyss that is the "Humor" section of Pinterest. Here are some of the crazy and funny things I've found lately. Hope they make you happy!  <3

Source: magicinthebackyard.files.wordpress.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: i.chzbgr.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: humortrain.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: the-lumineers.blogspot.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: imgfave.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: designbuzz.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Sweet Fantasy, Baby

I have a place in my little brain that is just for me. It's filled with so much ridiculousness happiness.

At night, I close my eyes, take a deep breath, and dream...

I dream that I'm off in Europe somewhere, it's cold and cloudy, and I'm wearing an extra large matching sweat suit cashmere loungewear, sipping Earl Grey tea next to a fire, cuddling up next to the love of my life, as he whispers this into my ear...

Bliss.

Then I make my way to the workout room, where my personal trainer leads me in a rigorous yoga practice, and I remain beautiful and desirable at all times. And it's not hard at all!

I proceed to the master suite where I read an educational, slightly pretentious novel atop my Tempur-Pedic-Cloud-Supreme-Gold-Woven- Diamond-Dusted mattress, whilst high-fiving a million angels.

Winning.

                                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Then, with the cursed sun ball of morning, I wake up. And reality sets in.

I start the day with a bowl of pure energy. Off-brand Frosted Mini-Wheats...

Then I feed the @$%#@ cat...

I write a really bad song...

[youtube=http://youtu.be/XNXIZuIBJKs]

Butt-kiss all the music venues I can possibly find...

Try and come up with my own Zumba moves at the apartment for my cheaper-than-a-gym workout...

[youtube=http://youtu.be/yJ_AU6tYYbg]

Babysit some kids...

And end the day with writing an epic blog post that is sure to inspire millions, if not billions of people.

Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all night folks, try the veal.

What do you DO All Day?!

This week, I've had a few people ask me the following question: "Now that you're 'not working,' what do you DO all day?!"

I go blank, every time. I get a little annoyed, a little hurt, and then I think, Man, I really need to blog about this. But all I say is,

"Um... you know... I just kinda, write and sing...."

I've never been the most quick-witted person. But if I was, here's what I would say:

"Oh, you know, not too much, except risking my life to pursue my dreams, where it is required of me to not only sing and perform as perfectly as possible, but it also requires me to write not just good - but STELLAR songs, perform said songs as much as possible, learn that "stellar songs" is a very broad term and dang near impossible to meet, book all my own shows, find money to pay for said shows via odd jobs, keep up with every social media outlet that exists, find a producer, network, convince successful people to take a chance on me, beg prospective fans to take a chance on me, and best of all, be judged by all of you. What do YOU do all day?"

You tell 'em, Self!

Ok, that was a little harsh. And I realize I sound like I'm complaining. I'm not. I am letting folks know that I ain't just sitting around the apartment, luring fans into a web of beautiful melodies via a crystal ball or something. I'm trying so, so hard. I'm scared on a regular basis. I'm overjoyed on a regular basis. I'm discouraged, too. I'm on a roller coaster of adventure, and I am choosing every hard second of it. It's worth every hard second of it.

Here are some quotes I live by these days. I found them on Pinterest, glorious Pinterest. They're great reminders for those of us pursuing great goals.

Source: happyserendipity.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: venspired.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: beautifulcarolinasun.tumblr.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: thatonerule.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: overcoming-obstacles.tumblr.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: tealcheesecake.tumblr.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: imgfave.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Source: iwastesomuchtime.com via Jessie on Pinterest

Just kidding on that last one. :P

Hear, Hear

 

Bullying in schools is getting a lot of press these days. Thank goodness. But bullying one's self is just as detrimental.

May this be my mantra, always.

Pinterest FAIL

I, like the rest of the American female population, am OBSESSED with Pinterest. I feel so motivated, inspired, moved... Who am I kidding... I just zone out and pin things I know I'll never cook, wear, decorate with, or make.

But ONCE in a blue moon, I do try something, and it's usually some sort of recipe.

This time, I attempted something called "Honey Cinnamon Roasted Chickpeas." They're supposed to taste crunchy, sweet, and somewhat like roasted nuts. I thought that sounded super cool, especially when coupled with this beautiful picture:

So, I grabbed the recipe and the ingredients, and did "exactly" as they said (I'm not very good with details).

But what I made was not a food. I had created little dots of what tasted like dirt turds, rolled in some honey. Here, see for yourself:

These little beauties are even worse tasting than they look... Oh well, in another 8 months, I'll try another. Slow and steady, slow and steady.

*I'd like to note... it's probably more USER ERROR than bad recipe...